I loathe a good meme. Actually, I loathe memes in general, but the cadence is off without the word “good” in the previous sentence. Certainly, if they do something constructive, like Kami Huyse’s “Thanks for the Influence” one, I’m game, but to tell stories about yourself or list your favorites always seems very high school kids in MySpace-y to me.
It’s also rather useless information since any good blackmail material I’ve volunteered for all to see. You shoulda seen some of those ole MySpace memes I participated in. I came this close to having several relatives never speak to me again. Guess I didn’t try hard enough.
At any rate, I’ve been tagged in the type of meme I don’t like. I could go quietly into fair night and only have my meme passer-oner slightly perplexed at me, but I happen to really like his work and expertise. He also seems the kind of person I’d enjoy having a cocktail with. And, I’m just coming off vacation and needed a little writing jump-start. So, as much as I loathe these things, here’s to Mark Story.
4 Things I Like About Summer
- Baseball – Give me a beer, a brat and nine innings and I’ll find peace, if only just for a few hours.
- A breeze on a warm day – One day, I will have a hammock. And I will sleep there sometimes.
- More daylight when I need it – In the winter, it’s dark when I get home from work. That sucks.
- Women wear skimpy clothes – I’m a guy. And I’m honest. Sue me.
4 Favorite Vacation Destinations
- Private, All-Inclusive Resorts – Went once, to Cancun. Loved it so much, if it weren’t for my children, I’d never vacation differently.
- Pittsburgh – I take long weekends and go there to watch my beloved Pirates. Any questions, see Answer No. 1 to list No. 1 above.
- My backyard – I like fiddling around with the lawnmower and feeling productive. I’ve only run over my own foot once.
- Anywhere with my kids – It could be to awful places like Chernobyl, North Korea or my mother’s house. As long as my kids are there, I’ll manage.
4 Favorite Summer Foods
- Grilled burgers – I knead garlic powder, McCormick’s seasoned tenderizer and a little Worcestershire into my hand-crafted patties. Yum.
- Honeydew – I like most melons (insert juvenile snicker here) but a sweet, ripe honeydew is my favorite.
- Ball park bratwurst – They’re usually awful, but if I’m at the ball park, the paper wrapper will taste good.
- A cold Corona – Sure, I can drink these anytime of year, but on a hot day at the pool, the beach or just in the yard, few things taste better than an ice cold Corona with lime.
4 Concerts Not To Miss
- Van Halen – I like both Dave and Sammy for different reasons. I don’t like any configuration without Michael Anthony and one of those two.
- John Prine – His songs sound like my life for some reason. He mixes sweetness with silliness in just the right proportion and I’d love to see him do it live. Of course, the drunk bastards screaming, “Illegal Smile,” in between songs would annoy me.
- Dave Matthews Band – Any musicians who play their asses off the way these guys do are worth seeing over and over.
- Tim Wilson – Like Mark, I’m picking a comedian. Wilson is a Southern comedian, much like the Blue Collar Comedy Tour guys, but plays guitar and writes hysterical songs. I’ve never left a Tim Wilson show without my sides hurting. I heard he recently moved to Louisville. I haven’t run into him yet.
4 Things To Avoid During the Summer
- To-Do Lists – My mother was good at these. My wife knows better.
- Hangovers – Not always easy to avoid, but certainly wise.
- Farms – Sun baked cow … yes, I’ll spare the full explanation.
- White Castle – Nothing to do with summer. Just smart to avoid.
And I’m not tagging anybody. Again, sue me.